After we realize we have become alcoholics that’s definitely the question of the day. How did this ever happen to me? It certainly wasn’t planned.
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When you think it over, even though you are well aware that you have a drinking problem, you decide “I don’t want to stop drinking alcohol.”
This does not come as a surprise. There is always a big part of every person addicted to alcohol that doesn’t want to stop, even in the face of the ongoing damage to your life, work, overall potential and motivation, and relationships.
Part of the definition of addiction is the continuing persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful or to have harmful consequences. Under normal circumstances no one would willingly pursue that course, but in the case of addiction you lose control of the situation and you now have a driving need for alcohol physically and mentally, so it’s natural that you don’t want to stop drinking.
Sometimes the idea of quitting alcohol – the idea of stopping the drinking for good – is a frightening proposition. You can’t even visualize your life without it. It is the big walk into the unknown. But somewhere every problem drinker knows that if they don’t cut the alcohol out of their lives, things are not going to get better. The question becomes how bad are things going to get for me? How far down is my life going to go?
One of the ironies of a serious drinking problem is it can bring down your self esteem to next to nothing because there is a part of you that doesn’t approve of your own behavior and that can wear on you. It doesn’t matter what other people know about your drinking habits, the important issue is you know and you’re the one who counts. Low self esteem can actually feed into the drinking as you may get to the point where you think so little of yourself (remember this is the alcohol talking) that you may get the idea that making your life better isn’t worth it, when nothing could be further from the truth.